Kelly Moore couldn't even communicate with her own son. "He had no receptive language whatsoever," recalls Moore, an Albemarle County mother of a 5 year-old. "He had to be taught imitation."

Moore's son suffers from autism, a developmental disorder that limits social and communicative skills. But after three years at the Charlottesville-based Virginia Institute of Autism, the boy is learning at a brisk pace and is expected to enter regular kindergarten in the fall.

The institute, started six years ago by frustrated parents of autistic children, serves 14 pupils ages 2-12. With more than 40 families - some from as far away as California - on its waiting list, the school is seeking to expand to serve 26.

A $3 million capital campaign is under way to pay for the school's renovations, the hiring of an autism expert and year-long training for one employee. Also, the institute will start training teens in life and career skills, as well as working with educators in area school system.

The campaign has received help from both the famous and the anonymous. Dave Matthews Band's charity, the Bama Works Fund, recently approved a three-year, $100,000 grant for the school, and Oscar nominee Sissy Spacek, the honorary chairwoman of the school's capital campaign, will film a public service announcement at the institute this week.

Charlottesville-area residents also have been generous to the campaign, which has raised about $1.5 million.

"They just are so happy to give", said Angela Sherman, a VIA parent. "You just have to ask." The institute uses Applied Behavioral Analysis, a method that rewards positive acts such as good eye contact, and discourages bad habits such as throwing tantrums. Children at the institute received favorite foods and video privileges when they follow instructions.

While the practice has met with controversy, prompting fears of toddlers worn out by hours of repetitive work and images of Pavlov's dogs, some parents say the institute's results have been remarkable.

Georgia Webb, the 10-year old daughter of school founders Alison and Bernard Webb, used to refuse to pick up a pencil or crayon. Now her parents say they can't keep her away from her art notebook. Georgia's older brother, Harry, who also is autistic, was largely non-verbal, but has become an independent 12-year old, the Webb's report.

Neither child attends a regular school, but both are coping successfully with autism, the Webb's said. "We never thought that our kids could learn to read or write or sit properly", Bernie Webb said.

At the institute, children who are easily distracted spend much time alone with their teachers, and others are assigned rooms that mimic traditional classrooms, preparing them for regular school. Above all, the school caters to the individual, although all of the children interact with other at various times.

Some students receive quite a bit of freedom. Twelve-year-old Blair Sherman, for one, gets to choose his own schedule. On a recent morning, he added sums on a calculator.

Blair, who has been in the school since its inception, will say hello to school employees and strangers, a significant accomplishment for an autism sufferer.

The boy attended elementary autism programs in Albemarle County, spending half his time there and half at VIA. But when he grew too old for the elementary program, he hit a wall in Albemarle.

"I guess we really had a problem when he hit middle school, " his mother, Angela Sherman, said.

Although there are autistic students in Albemarle's upper schools, there are no self-contained autism programs for older students.

"There are very few schools without a child with autism," said Tom Nash, Albemarle's director of special education and student services. The county's current total is 70 students, most of whom are in regular schools.

The institute's primary goal is to "mainstream" as many children as it can, ultimately sending them to public school.

But achieving that objective is expensive.

School systems pay for the children's tuition at the institute through the Comprehensive Services Act, which mandates appropriate schooling for disabled students.

Albemarle County's school system pays $13,860 a year for each part-time student and $27,720 annually for each full-time student. The county has 10 children enrolled, although the part-time and full-time number fluctuate as children become better equipped to attend regular classes.

The true expense per child, however, is far greater than the tuition cost to the school systems, according to VIA's executive director, Erika Drescher. She estimates the actual cost per child at $55,000 per year.

Much of that cost stems from the school's ratio of one teacher to each child, she said.

The institute's goal, Sherman said is to rely more on tuition and less on fund raising. Sherman carried the tuition cost herself in the early days, before the school received state certification in 1997, but Albemarle 's school system has been supportive in recent years, she said.

County school officials, however, are worried by the prospect of twice as many of its children going to VIA in the near future. "It raises a concern if you want to look at it from a purely financial place", Nash said.

Parents of children with needs have moved in droves to Albemarle, which has developed a good reputation for disabled children's services. Because of state and federal laws, the county is required to carry a considerable financial burden.

With VIA's expansion, even more out-of-state families likely will move to the area.

"We were very, very lucky to get our child in", said Moore, who moved here from Northern Virginia. "I know how hard it is to be on the waiting list".